Blog Post

4 simple ways to love your social life without booze

Mar 17, 2022

Let’s talk four simple ways to love your social life without alcohol!

I have never met a human being whose life didn’t improve by drinking less alcohol. 

While this isn't a moral conversation about drinking (if you want to have a glass of wine or mojito, go for it!), I want to share some tricks to help you feel more comfortable socially without alcohol. 

One of the things I hear a lot of women struggle with is how to cope with their social life and alcohol because you are a fun and popular woman!

Between the happy hours, travel adventures and bachelorette parties, you have fun things to do. 

But one action that will really help you feel amazing in your body is drinking little to no alcohol.

Perhaps you want to reduce alcohol but find it difficult to navigate social situations without a drink in hand. If so, then today’s message is for you.

The first thing is you need to become a woman who deals with her anxiety better. While it’s much improved now that I’m older, I still struggle with social anxiety at times. So you’re not alone.

It’s easy to grab a drink to quell the nerves, right? 

Here’s my tool for dealing with social anxiety:

Play out the worst case scenario. 

For example, you go to a party where you know no one. 

Worst case scenario: No one talks to you, you stand in the corner silently and feel sad and rejected.

Likelihood of this happening? Slim to none. But if it did happen what would you do? Leave early! Find something else fun to do. Go home & enjoy your sleep.

In reality, what will probably happen is you might feel awkward initially, but then someone will probably say hi. If not, challenge yourself to meet 5 new people. Make it a game. Or promise yourself you just have to stay for one hour, then you can go if you’re not having fun. (I’ve used this trick a lot!)

Notice if you sometimes reach for a drink to navigate social anxiety in new situations and if so, try this little trick of imagining the worst case scenario and then brainstorming how you would handle it. 

The second tip is learning how to cope with your stress better before going into social situations. When you’re stressed, you are more likely to grab a drink. 

There are two types of tired:

Tense tired and relaxed tired.

As a human, you will pretty much always feel tired by the end of the day, the question is, are you going to feel tense-tired or are you going to feel relaxed-tired? The goal is to feel relaxed-tired by the end of your day. 

Try going for a 20 minute jog first thing in the morning on the day that you have a first date. Happy hour with a new networking group? Do a yoga flow that morning. Wedding where you know no one? Listen to a relaxing yin nidra meditation before gussying up.

The third tip is learning how to go your own way in the face of social and peer pressure. When you go into social situations and you're committed to not drinking, but other people are drinking, it can be very easy to get swept up into what other people are doing and abandon your own intentions.

It's really important that you are a woman who's clear on and aligned with her goals and strong enough to deal with other people's opinions of her. 

Remember - you belong in a social situation, even if you're not drinking. One of the things that's helped me is to always have a non-alcoholic drink in hand. 

Grab a mocktail mojito (they are so refreshing and delish!) or ask the bartender to make you a custom mocktail. Or simply drink sparkling water.

Just the act of holding a drink will make you feel like you belong in a group of drinkers. When we choose not to participate in something that other people are doing, we can feel disconnected because we are choosing not to engage in their ritual of connection.  

Ask yourself: how can I bring this ritual of connection into my experience even though I’m not drinking and how can I be strong in my commitment to my own goals? 

People pleasers, listen up:

When you’re actively engaged in people-pleasing, the worst thing that can happen to you socially is having another human reject you.

When you reject people-pleasing as how you want to live life, the worst thing that can happen to you is rejecting yourself, your values and what's important to you. This little shift can really help you navigate peer pressure. 

The fourth tip is learning how to have more fun without alcohol

I think a lot of people struggle to drink less socially because they see it as a way to access being less inhibited, being fun, playful and goofy. 

I want to remind you that you can access those state without alcohol by letting your inner child come out to play. (She’s still in there!)

You will also have better conversations without alcohol. Even if you're with people who are drinking, you will be the sober one so you'll be able to guide and lead conversations so they are more coherent and enjoyable.

Feeling bored at a social event can also lead to alcohol use. If you love the people you're with, you won't need alcohol to have a good time with them. 

But if you need a drink (or three) to enjoy yourself with this group of people, they aren't your people! 

Give yourself permission to make new friends and to leave social events that aren’t fun.

When you start practicing these tools, you will feel greater joy and happiness because you won't be drinking as much. Remember alcohol is a central nervous system depressant. So if you are someone who's more prone to anxiety or depression, then drinking less can really enhance your mental health.

Not to mention your sleep, your belly fat, your energy and vitality. Bye hangovers! 

I hope you enjoyed today's topic and at least one of these tools helped you!